Shutting down can become a comfortable place for many people who have had difficult relationships with their caretakers. This is especially true if said caretaker is a narcissist or has narcissistic traits. Abusers of this fashion need their targets to perform to a certain level while not overshadowing them. This means that often the abuser is spending their time beating down the target of their abuse. Sometimes this can go too far, and the abused will shut down or emotionally collapse from the burden.
This tends to be the time that an abuser will swoop in and build the abused back up so that they can keep performing. This is the time that an abuser will show empathy, care, and kindness. They will comfort their target until said target is able to function again. It is then that they will continue their slog of criticism. This period is very important. It might be the only time these abused individuals receive comfort from their caretaker or later relationships in life.
An abused person is taught that the only time they are comforted is when they shut down. This precursor to comfort can condition us to shut down more often in an attempt to get emotional support from those around us. The problem is that this system only works in abuse and appears as attention seeking in typical relationships. This shut down is then ignored by non-abusive people. It creates isolation and loneliness.
It is okay to ask for comfort in healthy relationships. If you are looking for comfort, ask for it from safe people in your life. Try reaching out to someone in the next few weeks to ask for emotional needs to be met. See if the bond strengthens. Why would you deprive others of the chance to help you, especially if you derive joy from helping others?